Life has been a roller coaster in the last 2 months. But it has taught me and given me an insight to a lot of things. I have been on Shaadi.com one of the most popular matrimonial sites in the last few months pretty seriously. I had all my doubts about it working, but still had faith and went on. A friend was asking me why this method of finding your partners. I said, most have us do not have the liberty to get married to anybody we see. We have to find somebody of our own castes and community and this is the way where we can filter people and find soul mates.
But who am I bull shitting? There are only two kinds of people who are in these matrimonial sites. The ugly ones who just dont have any chance of finding a partner. The second types are those who is actually had been gutless to get into a permanent, commited relationship but was brave enough to stay single inspite of all pressures of the society.
The second kinds are active in these matrimonial sites for only one reason. They are afraid that they will be forced to marry somebody of their caste and community from a very laid back set up. So they want to checkout the compatibility, have some fun talking, maybe a a Long Distance Relationship(LDR) and then decide to take it to parents. Well the last step happenning is of low probability. If one of the party decides to take it to parents a little earlier, to avoid any disappointments later, well be prepared for an absconding person.
Well I am not blaming these guys. Indian Marriages are always and almost a tie down for high spirits like me. Marriage sounds like retirement. In our society everybody is expected to study well, find a high paying job, get married, buy a house and pay for the house all through your young age, when ideally you should be scuba diving, visiting places and maybe para sailing.Not to mention kids. An abode to reside and live comfortably is a necessity but not at the cost of your entire young age to repent later for not having done a lot of things when you were young. But the problem is that, we start yearning for company to do these stuff. A company beyond friendship. A casual relationship with somebody of the other sex is a taboo of course.
To ponder more on the thought, what if we end up with somebody who has his/her interests on totally different grounds. Say for instance, I am not a party animal but I enjoy being in one once in a while, get lost in the never ending trans music, dance a little, drink a little, crack some nonsense jokes and unwind. I am afraid I might have to forget having this pleasure once i retire - oops marry somebody my parents see.
Well we do get a chance to express all that we claim to be interested in, in the matrimonial profiles. But to what degree the interest is something one can never express. This is something we need to find out by whatever means. All said and done... I am still having my faith, i am still in Shaadi.com and the search is still on.
Labels: State of Mind
